What to Say to Your Ex to Get Him Back Over Text: 8 Tips

Reaching out to an ex can be nerve-wracking, especially when you’re hoping to reignite a connection. Knowing what to say to your ex to get him back over text can make all the difference in whether that spark rekindles or fizzles out.

Whether you’re looking to mend a misunderstanding or simply want to reconnect, choosing the right words is key. In this guide, we’ll explore practical tips and message ideas that can help you approach this delicate situation with confidence and clarity, making it easier to open the door to a new chapter together.

Examples of Texts to Send

Casual Reconnect Messages

Casual reconnect messages are designed to break the ice without putting any pressure on your ex. These texts are light and non-threatening, making them an excellent way to re-establish communication. The idea is to spark a conversation by referencing a shared memory or a mutual interest without diving into emotional or heavy topics. By keeping it casual, you make it easier for your ex to respond, potentially opening the door for more meaningful conversations down the line.

1. “Hey, I came across that old playlist we used to jam to. Made me think of you. How have you been?”
2. “Just passed by our favorite coffee shop. Remember that time we stayed there until closing?”
3. “Do you still watch [favorite show]? I saw a new episode and it made me think of our binge-watching sessions.”
4. “I was sorting through some old photos and found one of us at [event]. Good times.”
5. “Hey! I just tried that new place you mentioned. Reminded me of how much we used to love exploring new spots.”
6. “I heard your favorite band is coming to town soon. Thought you’d want to know!”
7. “Just had the best [dish] at that place you love. Remember our food adventures?”
8. “Was just thinking about that hilarious movie night we had. How are you these days?”
9. “I saw something today that totally reminded me of that inside joke we had. Hope you’re doing well!”
10. “Passed by that park we used to hang out at. Brought back some nice memories.”
11. “Ran into [mutual friend] today. Made me think about how you’re doing.”
12. “Hey, remember that crazy road trip we took? I was just reminiscing about it.”
13. “Saw [movie/book] today, totally reminded me of you. How’s life treating you?”
14. “Just finished [activity] and it reminded me of the fun we used to have together.”
15. “I was thinking about that time we went to [place]. We should catch up sometime!”
16. “Had a dream about [shared experience] last night. Woke up smiling. How have you been?”
17. “Do you remember [shared hobby]? I’ve been getting back into it lately. Made me think of you.”
18. “I saw [mutual acquaintance] the other day. They mentioned your name, which got me thinking.”
19. “Found that gift you got me. Brought back some good memories.”
20. “Hey! I was at [place] and remembered that time we [shared experience]. How are things with you?”
21. “I tried making that recipe you taught me. It didn’t turn out as well as yours did!”
22. “Do you remember when we got lost in [place]? I was telling someone that story today.”
23. “I was listening to our old playlist today. It brought back so many memories.”
24. “Just heard a joke that reminded me of you. You always had the best sense of humor.”
25. “Passed by [specific place] today and couldn’t help but smile at the memory of us there.”

Apologetic and Reflective Messages

Apologetic and reflective messages are important when you need to acknowledge your part in the breakup. These texts focus on taking responsibility for any mistakes or misunderstandings that contributed to the relationship’s end. By offering a sincere apology, you show maturity and a willingness to change, which can soften your ex’s feelings and make them more open to reconnecting. These messages are best used when you’ve had time to reflect and genuinely want to make amends.

1. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and realize I could have handled things better. I’m truly sorry.”
2. “I want to apologize for my part in how things ended. You deserved better from me.”
3. “I’ve had some time to reflect, and I regret how I let things go between us. I’m sorry.”
4. “I’m sorry for any pain I caused you. I’ve been thinking a lot about how things went wrong.”
5. “I want to own up to my mistakes. I didn’t appreciate you the way I should have.”
6. “I regret the way things ended, and I’m sorry for my part in that.”
7. “I’ve had some time to think, and I realize I could have been more understanding. I’m sorry.”
8. “I’ve been reflecting on our relationship, and I regret how things ended. I’m truly sorry.”
9. “I’m sorry for not being the person you needed me to be when we were together.”
10. “I realize now how much my actions hurt you, and I’m deeply sorry for that.”
11. “I want to apologize for the mistakes I made in our relationship. You deserved better.”
12. “I’ve been thinking a lot about us, and I’m sorry for my role in our breakup.”
13. “I realize I let my ego get in the way, and I’m sorry for the pain I caused.”
14. “I’m sorry for not listening to you more when we were together. I should have been more attentive.”
15. “I regret the way I handled things, and I’m sorry for any hurt I caused you.”
16. “I’ve come to understand how my actions affected you, and I’m truly sorry for that.”
17. “I’m sorry for not being the partner you deserved. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately.”
18. “I’ve had time to reflect, and I’m sorry for not being more supportive when you needed me.”
19. “I want to apologize for the way things ended. I know I could have done better.”
20. “I’m sorry for the hurt I caused you. I wish I could go back and change things.”
21. “I’ve been reflecting on our relationship, and I’m sorry for the pain I caused.”
22. “I realize I didn’t appreciate you the way I should have, and I’m sorry for that.”
23. “I’m sorry for the way I handled things. You deserved more understanding from me.”
24. “I want to apologize for the mistakes I made. I’ve been thinking a lot about how I could have been better.”
25. “I’m sorry for not being there for you the way I should have. I regret how things ended.”

Expressing Desire to Reconnect

Expressing a desire to reconnect messages is for when you’re ready to make your intentions clear. These texts are more direct, letting your ex know that you miss what you had together and would like to explore the possibility of rekindling the relationship. While still being respectful and not overly aggressive, these messages convey that you’re interested in giving the relationship another chance. This category is ideal when you feel confident that both you and your ex might be open to reconciliation.

1. “I’ve been thinking a lot about us lately. I miss what we had, and I’d love to talk about it.”
2. “I miss our conversations. Would you be open to catching up sometime?”
3. “I’ve been reminiscing about our time together. Would you be interested in meeting up?”
4. “I miss the connection we shared. Do you think we could start fresh?”
5. “I’ve realized how much you mean to me. I’d love to see if we can make things work again.”
6. “I miss the way we used to laugh together. Do you think we could give us another shot?”
7. “I’ve been thinking about how much I miss you. Would you be open to talking about us?”
8. “I miss the bond we had. Do you think we could explore the possibility of getting back together?”
9. “I’ve come to realize how much I value you. Can we talk about where we stand?”
10. “I miss the way things were between us. Would you be open to seeing if we can get that back?”
11. “I’ve been reflecting on our relationship, and I’d love to see if we can start over.”
12. “I miss having you in my life. Can we talk about what went wrong and see if we can fix it?”
13. “I’ve realized how much I care about you. Would you be open to exploring the possibility of us again?”
14. “I miss the connection we shared. Would you be open to giving us another try?”
15. “I’ve been thinking a lot about us. Do you think we could have another chance?”
16. “I miss the way we used to be. Would you be willing to talk about how we can get that back?”
17. “I’ve realized how much you mean to me. Can we talk about where we go from here?”
18. “I miss what we had together. Do you think we could give it another shot?”
19. “I’ve been thinking about us a lot lately. Would you be open to meeting up to talk?”
20. “I miss the closeness we shared. Would you be willing to talk about getting that back?”
21. “I’ve come to understand how much I value our relationship. Can we discuss the possibility of getting back together?”
22. “I miss having you in my life. Would you be open to seeing if we can make things work again?”
23. “I’ve been reflecting on us, and I’d love to see if we can rekindle what we had.”
24. “I miss the connection we had. Would you be willing to talk about how we can get that back?”
25. “I’ve realized how much you mean to me. Can we talk about giving us another try?”

Tips for Successful Communication

1. Timing Matters

The timing of your message can significantly impact how it’s received. You want to choose a moment when your ex is likely to be in a relaxed and receptive mood. Avoid sending texts during times of high stress, such as work hours or late at night.

Instead, consider reaching out in the early evening or on a weekend when they might be more open to engaging in a meaningful conversation. Additionally, pay attention to any recent events in their life; for example, if they’ve just gone through a challenging experience, it might be better to wait until things have settled down.

2. Keep It Short and Sweet

Less is often more when it comes to texting, especially in sensitive situations. Long, drawn-out messages can feel overwhelming and might cause your ex to shut down before they even finish reading. Aim for concise, thoughtful texts that get your point across without rambling.

By keeping your messages short and to the point, you allow your ex the space to process what you’re saying and respond without feeling pressured. This approach also demonstrates that you respect their time and are mindful of their feelings.

3. Be Prepared for Any Outcome

When reaching out to an ex, it’s important to be mentally prepared for any response—or even no response at all. While you might be hoping for a positive reaction, there’s always the possibility that your ex isn’t ready or interested in reconnecting.

To protect your emotional well-being, remind yourself that their response (or lack thereof) isn’t a reflection of your worth. Be prepared to accept whatever outcome arises, whether it’s a renewed connection, a polite decline, or silence. This mindset will help you stay grounded and prevent you from becoming overly invested in a particular outcome.

4. Avoid Over-Texting

It’s crucial to give your ex space to respond without feeling bombarded by multiple messages. Over-texting can come across as desperate or needy, which might push your ex further away. Send one well-thought-out text and then allow them time to reply at their own pace.

If they don’t respond right away, resist the urge to follow up immediately. Patience is key; give them the space they need to consider their feelings and decide how they want to proceed.

5. Choose Your Words Carefully

The language you use in your texts can greatly influence the tone of the conversation. Avoid using negative or accusatory language that might reopen old wounds or cause defensive reactions. Instead, focus on positive, constructive language that encourages open dialogue.

Be mindful of your tone, aiming to come across as sincere, calm, and understanding. This approach will make your ex more likely to engage in a productive conversation.

6. Don’t Play Mind Games

When trying to reconnect with an ex, it’s important to be genuine and straightforward in your communication. Avoid playing mind games, such as trying to make them jealous or testing their feelings.

These tactics can backfire and create unnecessary drama, making it less likely that you’ll achieve a positive outcome. Instead, be honest about your intentions and communicate openly about your feelings. Authenticity is far more likely to lead to a successful and meaningful reconnection.

7. Respect Their Boundaries

It’s essential to respect your ex’s boundaries when you reach out to them. If they express that they need space or aren’t ready to talk, honor that request. Pushing too hard can damage any chance of rebuilding a relationship.

Instead, let them know that you’re open to talking whenever they’re ready and then give them the time they need. This shows maturity and respect, which can positively influence how they perceive you and your intentions.